27th May 2013 - Durban

Seesaw & cousin

Roy and I have just returned from the High Court in Durban where building contractor, Seesaw Msoapme, a cousin of the incumbent president, has abandoned his company, Steelall. The letters of final demand showed that the unpaid debts, allegedly amounting to millions, were owed entirely by Seesaw. Seesaw made his money by subcontracting lucrative government tenders that he emphatically states were not given to him because of his relationship with his first cousin......No! 

Judge Foryourself catching a quick nap

One of the long list of subcontractors, Stiffbro, was granted an order by Judge Foryourself to liquidate Steelall Construction. Judge Foryourself, who had just finished a hearty lunch of processed recycled sausage meats & the odd can of dogfood for flavor, all sandwiched between two loaves of white bread & washed down by four liters of coke, had nodded off twice as her system tried valiantly to digest the culinary onslaught whilst still keeping her conscious enough to pass judgement. Court papers have revealed that Seesaw's company, Steelall, owed Stiffbro seven large ones, a herd of Nguni, three skins of the endangered northern Natal leopard & a mud hut next to Zuma's recently refurbished tribal compound at Nkandla. In 2010, Stiffbro had been subcontracted by the bankrupt municipality in Mpumalanga to build 400 low cost mud huts near Piet Retief for illegal immigrants from Swaziland & Mozambique, & occasionally including the odd lost Zimbo.

Forkjulle garden chair

Seesaw was questioned about his involvement with regard to procurement and payment of the aptly named, Stiffbro. He stated that the company was not operating now and man'age'ment had left the company to join an offshoot called Forkjulle that specialized in paper machet garden furniture specifically designed not to withstand rain.

'We need return business,' quoted the Mozambican area sales manager for Forkjulle, Mas O Menos Porkachees.

'la Zuma' Mud Huts

The Department of Human Resettlement in Mpumalange stated that we issued contracts to the value of R331 million and the biggest benefactor had been Steelall who had not paid for any of the work surrounding the 'state of the art' mud huts 'a la Zuma'. It seems as if any one related to the President gets preferential treatment when it come to tenders, and every one of them makes a complete dog's breakfast of the work if indeed they even attempt the work in the first place, all the while pocketing millions of tax payers' money & keeping all of BMW, Mercedes & Audi sales at an all-time high & only second to the Emirates on the world car market.